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Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.worldEnglish · 2 days ago

The horse knows the way home

slrpnk.net

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The horse knows the way home

slrpnk.net

Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.worldEnglish · 2 days ago
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  • Afaithfulnihilist@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    3 hours ago

    No matter how drunk you get, the horse always remembers the way home.

  • ikidd@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    17 hours ago

    I can’t get my horse to get within a stone’s throw of a truck that he’s seen daily for 5 years but is apparently still the scariest thing on earth and will eat him.

    If I tried to take him into a convenience store, he’d probably buck me off and drag me to death across the parking lot.

    • Track_Shovel@slrpnk.netOP
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      15 hours ago

      Can I watch?

      • ikidd@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        12 hours ago

        Only if my estate gets the video rights.

  • robocall@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    I believe this is still a DUI even though the horse is smart enough to cause any trouble

    • MML@sh.itjust.works
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      14 hours ago

      Even if it isn’t most places can’t sell you alcohol if you are already drunk (but I think this is just supposed to be a funny image)

      • Corkyskog@sh.itjust.works
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        3 hours ago

        In practice, this never seems to apply to a liqour store and only serving establishments. Mostly because the interaction/observation window is so short. If they could get their car into the parking lot without crashing into anything and if they could shuffle over to the booze and back to the register without falling over we would have to sell it to them… Especially if they don’t talk during that process.

    • Sv443@sh.itjust.works
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      1 day ago

      Not if the horse is drunk too

      puking horse

      • Urfgurgle@reddthat.com
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        23 hours ago

        Horses are physically incapable of vomiting fyi

        • Ceruleum@lemmy.wtf
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          19 hours ago

          This ai image proofs that you are wrong!

    • Holytimes@sh.itjust.works
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      1 day ago

      It is and it isn’t. If you are actively riding the horse and in control of the reigns then you are operating a means of transportation and thus can get a DUI.

      On the flip side if your passed the fuck out and slung over the horse and the horse is dragging your drunk ass home. You can’t get a DUI. You can get charged with other things tho.

      It varies slightly depending where you are. But it’s a rather silly problem that rarely comes up.

      • ᴍᴜᴛɪʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴᴡᴀᴠᴇ @lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        20 hours ago

        Nah friend, they will give you a DUI if they want. Horse, bicycle, car, whatever. You can be doing the responsible thing and sleeping in your car and get DUI. I had a sober friend get pulled over running an orange light, searched his car, found his little metal bowl and charged him DUI. They administered a drug test which of course showed weed.

      • SalmiakDragon@feddit.nu
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        1 day ago

        If I see a cop, immediately feign unconsciousness - got it!

    • Iron Lynx@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      In my area (NL) riding a horse, or even walking beside it and guiding it, still classifies you as a driver, and thus you’d be on the hook for a DUI in this situation.

  • Chef_Boyargee@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    You really shouldn’t drink and horse, man

  • baggachipz@sh.itjust.works
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    2 days ago

    Facebook is leaking

    • inb4_FoundTheVegan@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      • baggachipz@sh.itjust.works
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        1 day ago

        • rmuk@feddit.uk
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          20 hours ago

      • daggermoon@piefed.world
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        1 day ago

      • MrKoyun@lemmy.world
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        1 day ago

    • baggachipz@sh.itjust.works
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      1 day ago

      deleted by creator

  • JebanuusPisusII@szmer.info
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    1 day ago

    Hats off to this alcoholic*

    FTFY

  • kkj@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    2 days ago

    Horses are smarter than cars or bikes, faster than walking, and more available than public transportation in many places. I get his logic.

    • Zwiebel@feddit.org
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      1 day ago

      She asked why hes riding it into the store not to the store tho

      • Macchi_the_Slime@piefed.blahaj.zone
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        1 day ago

        Nowhere to hitch the horse outside maybe?

        • Mesophar@pawb.social
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          1 day ago

          Drives truck through display window

          “Sorry, all the parking spots were full!”

          • Zwiebel@feddit.org
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            20 hours ago

            It’s a free country

  • dadarobot@lemmy.sdf.org
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    2 days ago

    a horse walks into a beerstore, the clerk says “why the long face?”

    • PancakesCantKillMe@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      “Because I’m an alcoholic and it’s killing my family,” he whinnied.

    • Anna@lemmy.ml
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      1 day ago

      It’s a genetic disposition due to the fact that I’m a horse…

      ~exurb1a

  • hansolo@lemmy.today
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    1 day ago

    Idiot.

    Cashier opens a plastic bag for the beer. Horse flips its shit and bucks him through the ceiling and kills itself crashing into every sharp thing in the store. Total legend only if he and the horse lived.

    I’m joking, but that horse is clearly very not pleased to be in there.

    • Holytimes@sh.itjust.works
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      1 day ago

      Horses are never pleased. You arnt giving them enough treats.

      They also are actively always trying to explode and implode at the same time and the effort to maintain both plodsions makes them grumpy.

      Also the broom moved. WHY DID THE BROOM MOVE HAN?! THE WORLD IS ENDING AHHHHHHH!!!

      • hansolo@lemmy.today
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        14 hours ago

        They also are actively always trying to explode and implode at the same time and the effort to maintain both plodsions makes them grumpy.

        Best thing I’ve seen today! LOL

      • ikidd@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        17 hours ago

        This guy horses.

      • just_an_average_joe@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        1 day ago

        Yes, you’re also supposed to press G to pet them, and press B to brush. It also increases their stamina

      • dkppunk@piefed.social
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        1 day ago

        Horses are never pleased. You arnt giving them enough treats.

        Sounds just like my rabbits with their perpetual frowns. I guess horses and rabbits are more similar than I thought.

  • WhiskyTangoFoxtrot@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    Ask him about that year in college.

  • pigup@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    … legend entitled abusive inconsiderate reckless asshole.

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