Now I’m picturing a T-rex doing a Naruto run. I’m not sure I will ever be able to take T-rex seriously again.

8,000 species of termites survived the flood, implying that Noah had them on his wooden boat. Of course, Noah is an idiot.

My solution to politics: if 50,000 people vote that we should execute you, we execute you. Pretty soon there would be no politicians left.

Missed opportunity for a Coal Bear that’s black instead of brown.

I would like to see Mr. Too Fat to Walk climb that Jacob’s Ladder.

I think you would enjoy the concept of solipsism. We’re all just thinking computers driving around skeletons with flesh armor. Maybe our flesh mechs are part of the simulation too.

Can we keep me safe from Pinterest? I would really like to exclude it from my search results on a permanent basis without having to explicitly filter it in my query.

I met my wife on GitHub. (/s)

I feel like the only way to teach them that slavery is wrong is to enslave them. I will personally volunteer to recreate the whipping scene from Roots for everyone who thinks slavery wasn’t so bad. Starting with the orange.