fizzle

God that sounds horrific. I had no idea.

All this stuff is still around, you just ignore it in favour of things like lemmy which are better at stimulating dopamine production.

I basically just avoid exposing ports from containers unless I really do want them exposed on the host?

Most services go through my reverse proxy, traefik.

Things like databases don’t publish ports on the host because they’re only accessed internally, using their container name.

Yeah I’ve been using wireguard for a long time myself personally, and more recently for a small team to access an intranet.

I’m a big fan. After a half hour or so trying to understand configs it’s pretty manageable.

This. A cast iron pan just stores so much more heat than anything else. IDK the sciency chef-talk but if you like meat to look crusty and golden on the outside but tender on the inside then this is the way.

I basically just completely disregard any bullshit “seasoning” advice, and I’ve never had any rust or whatever. I don’t scrub it with steel wool or whatever but I don’t scrub anything with that. Sometimes I put a few cm of water in it and let that boil off any crusted on whatever.

I’ve been trying to get zulip working.

Sounds like it addresses your requirements.

Seems to be a real bitch to self host - I’ve been doing this a while but the compose yaml is pretty arcane with hundreds of environment variables.

I didn’t “give up” exactly but it’s been on the back burner for a month or so now.

I don’t really have this conversation with people.

This stuff is important to me, it’s not really accessible to people without lots of time and the same interest.

Yeah, I do think 20 is too young.

why wait if you know what you want?

This is a fair question but honestly there’s so many good reasons to wait.

The obvious answer is… if it’s really what you want then what’s the hurry ? I mean it’s great that you’ve found your life partner and whatever and that your future seems so certain, but why complicate things with marriage? I’m honestly kinda wondering. Is it the commitment that’s important to you? Are you waiting to have sex? Do you actually want to get pregnant?

If it’s the commitment that you want, then oh my god marriage is a terrible idea.

If it’s sex, then… well… there’s probably not much I can say that will change your mind. Still a terrible idea.

If it’s kids then if your wife to be gets pregnant before commencing a career you’re king of condemning her to a life time of minimum wage jobs. You might be planning for a trad-wife kind of situation but … plans change. It’s a bit like planning for a career as a rock star - it’s great to follow your dreams but your partner needs a plan B.

If none of the above apply then there doesn’t seem to be any good reason to get married. Spend 5 years living with your respective parents and save up for a deposit on a house or something.

I’m honestly kinda surprised that Google is apparently not in fact doing this already and (according to the comments here) continues to not do so.